Reflecting Light
by GilmoresDanes
Summary: Lorelai feels like she has hurt everybody around her. After hearing a song on the radio that reminds her of the people she hurt, she leaves notes for all her loved ones and leaves town. Set after she breaks up with Christopher. Was originally going to be a one shot but I think I can develop a story with it. I do not own rights to the song or characters. *ON HIATUS*
1. Lorelai's POV

**This chapter will be solely focused on Lorelai. Read the summary to understand the whole meaning behind this.**

I turn on the radio hoping that it can help me unwind. I have had such a crap day and I need to feel happy Reflecting Light by Sam Phillips is on. I remember this song from Liz and TJ's wedding, when Luke and I danced. That was such a good day

_Now that I've worn out, I've worn out the world _

_I'm on my knees in fascination, __Looking through the night,_

_And the moon's never seen me before, But I'm reflecting light,_

I feel so worn out. I'm so tired of going through this all the time. I'm sick of hurting the people I love because I can't make decisions for my self. I've worn out Rory, Luke, my parents. Everyone just because of what I do. Why do I have to be so stupid?  
_I rode the pain down, Got off and looked up, _

_Looked into your eyes, _

_The lost open windows, All around, _

_My dark heart lit up the skies,_

I remember how hurt Luke looked when I told him I slept with Christopher. He was so lost and angry, not the Luke that I had grown to love. And it was all my fault. I felt like I had torn the town apart everyone was happy when we got back together and I just had to go and screw it all up again. br /I can't keep any of my relationships going. Not with Max, Jason, Luke or even Christopher.  
_Now that I've worn out, I've worn out the world,_

_ I'm on my knees in fascination, Looking through the night,_

_ And the moon's never seen me before, But I'm reflecting light, _

_C_an my parents still talk to me after everything. I ran away from home, kept their granddaughter away from them and started up a life without them. God how selfish am I? I remember how hurt they were when we saw each other for the first time after I had ran away. My mother was so hurt and I caused that drift between us, it was all me. Everything is all my fault. The only thing I am good at is screwing everything up  
_Give up the ground, Under your feet,_

_ Hold on to nothing for good, _

_Turn and run at the mean dogs, Chasing you,_

_ Stand-alone and misunderstood,_

Is it time I walk away from everything. Should I just up run away, because everyone knows I'm good at that. I mean I managed to stuff up the strong relationship I had with Rory, all because I couldn't strand by and watch her make her own life choices.

_Now that I've worn out, I've worn out the world _

_I'm on my knees in fascination, Looking through the night _

_And the moon's never seen me before, But I'm reflecting light,_

I grab the things I need and leave notes to those who meant the most to me in this town. This town doesn't need me any more. I've got to move away and let them have their lives back. They don't need me screwing anything else up for any of them.I get in my Jeep and drive wherever the road will lead me.


	2. Dear Rory,

Rory gets home early after finishing college for the week. She gets home hoping she can go to her Grandparents with her mother. She had so much of her week that she wanted to share with her mother.  
But instead she found the house empty.

Rory called out for her mother, but nothing her car was gone too. How could she not notice that her mother's Jeep wasn't in the driveway.

After searching around the house Rory found a note with her name on it, her mother's hand-writing on the front.

After putting off opening it for a few minutes, Rory finally plucked up the courage to open the letter.

_My dearest little Rory, _

_I am so sorry for everything I have ever put you through. I cannot believe that you have stuck by me after everything I have done. I have done nothing right to help keep a real family around for you. Every relationship I have ever had, I screwed them up and I could see how hard it hurt you and I'm sorry. _

_I cannot believe that I let us fall out too. It hurt me that I just let you walk away. I regret not coming to support you in court and being their for you when you had to deal with grandma and grandpa after me and Luke broke up. _

_You deserve everything good that comes to you kid. You are the sweetest kid I have ever met, and that isn't me being biased. _

_I'm sorry I have to leave like this. I just, I don't want to hurt anybody else in this town. I have done nothing but ruin everything around here. I cannot have this town hating you because of me. _

_I love you kid, I am so glad I got to be your mother. _

_Yours _

_Lorelai x_

Rory was in tears. Her mom must have been feeling this was for a long time.

Where would she go? it doesn't look like she's taken anything.

What would she do?

Rory had so many unanswered questions but it looks like only her mom could answer them.

and she was gone.


	3. Dear Mom,

The post had just been delivered, Emily's latest maid had handed her a letter that she never thought she would receive.

Seeing her daughters hand-writing on the front of the letter made Emily's heart skip a beat. Lorelai never sends letters. She always speaks up front or on the phone.

Just opening the letter formed tears in her eyes

_Mom,_

_I don't know what to say. I can't believe that after all the times I hurt you and dad you both stuck by me. I mean why would you, I ran away with your granddaughter and started my life fresh. I think about what I did every day and I am sorry that I hurt you like that._

_You didn't deserve anything I did to you. I understand now what your intentions were, you were just looking out for me and making sure I wouldn't get hurt._

_I will admit there have been times were what you have done have hurt me, but I cannot imagine the pain and suffering I have caused you over the last 39 years. _

_You deserved a better daughter not me. I don't know how I ended up living in such a loving family, that would care for me. _

_I want you to know that I am starting fresh somewhere else. I don't want to cause Rory the pain I caused you. She's a good kid and doesn't deserve me being her mother. _

_Please, the only thing I will ask of you is that you look out for her. _

_I love you loads Mom,_

_I am so sorry to leave again,_

_Yours,_

_Lorelai x_

Emily was in tears, she stood up from where she was and found her husband crying too. Holding a letter in his hands.

Lorelai had this well thought out.

How long had her daughter been feeling like this?

She was so busy criticizing everything her daughter did, she didn't think about how her daughter was feeling.

And now she felt guilty because she had drove her daughter to leave, and leave everyone she loves behind.

Emily walked up and enveloped her husband into a hug

She assured him that they would find Lorelai, and they would fix this.

Because Emily will not let her daughter walk away again, she just can't.


	4. Dear Dad,

The maid had done her daily mail run to Richards office again. He always had business letters coming that he didn't expect to see the letter at the front of the pile.

He recognised that hand-writing. It was Lorelai's, his heart sunk. Lorelai had always called him if she needed something. She never sends letters, she's never sent letters.

He opened the letter without hesitation and he didn't expect to read the things that were on the paper.

_Dad, _

_I am so sorry, for everything. You have done nothing but support me. You have gave me everything I have ever wanted. You helped me when I needed money for Rory's school and college tuition. You helped me when I needed money to start up the Inn. You helped me when I needed to sort the insurance on the Inn. _

_You have helped me with everything and all I can do is run away. _

_I will never forget when you were there for me on my 13th birthday because I was upset. I had just been dumped by my boyfriend and I had ran away to the mall. You were mad when you saw me because I should've been at school. I just cried and cried. You bought me a pretzel and took me to watch a movie to cheer me up because you once told me that you hated seeing me upset. _

_I am so sorry daddy, I screwed it up again. I hated myself so bad when I ran away with Rory. I cannot justify my actions because they were selfish. _

_I hope now that you understand that I know that it wasn't your fault or Moms or Christopher's it was mine._

_Please, please look after Mom and Rory. _

_I love you dad, I will never forget you,_

_Yours,_

_Lorelai x_

He looked up from the letter and felt his wife behind him, hugging him.

He had hated that they never got to sit down and talk about any of this.

He was so blinded by his work he couldn't see his own daughter falling apart right in front of him.

His only daughter had ran away again because things had gotten too much for her.

He just hoped that they could find her soon, so that they could help her.

He hopes they find her fast enough, he couldn't live with himself if he lost Lorelai forever.


	5. Dear Sookie and Jackson

Sookie had just got home from a long day at the Inn. Without Lorelai there nobody got much done, because nobody could run the place like she did.

Nobody in town was yet aware of Lorelai's disappearance, so Sookie thought she was just taking the day off.

Jackson was sat in his usual chair, holding a letter.

The letter was addressed to both of them. The couple knew it was letter from Lorelai, and Jackson had stated he wanted to wait until Sookie was home to open it.

_To Sookie and Jackson,_

_Thank you to both of you for putting up with me for so long. You have both been so kind to me, I could never thank you enough for listening to all my rants about failed relationships. _

_Especially you Sookie, you have been the bestest friend a girl could ask for. I am super grateful to have gotten to know you. Thank you for all your help with Rory, without you she wouldn't have become the kid she is today. Thank you for running the Inn with me. Please take care of the place._

_Jackson, I know I don't need to say this because you do it already but please look after Sookie and the kids for me. You have become a real gentlemen over the last 7 years and I am happy to see you and Sookie so happy together._

_Please don't let Martha or Davey forget about me, I love those kiddo's. _

_I am sorry I have to leave town like this but please know I will be safe. I have to leave because I cannot hurt the people around me anymore. Seeing everyone I have ever hurt, it kills me._

_There is so much I want to say I just don't know how to say it._

_Take care of yourselves_

_Love you both loads, Martha and Davey too._

_Yours, _

_Lorelai x_

Neither one of the pair spoke.

They had no words for what they had just read.

How could they be so blind to miss this.

Surely Lorelai had been feeling like this for a while.

Both felt partly to blame for neglecting the woman.

How could they fix this?


	6. Dear Michel

Michel had just got home when he found the letter in his mailbox.

He waited until he was inside to read it because he didn't really think much of it.

Once he noticed the handwriting on the front, his heart sank.

He and Lorelai had been working together for a while, and they had become close over the years.

He had noticed her missing over the last few days, but he didn't think anything of it.

Until now.

_Michel,_

_Thank you so much for all your support with the Inn and working with me it has been a pleasure._

_I would love for you and Sookie to keep running that Inn for me, I know how much you love that place._

_You have really grown on me over the years, and I will admit that I will miss you. Even though you are sarcastic 9 times out of 10 I know that you don't mean any harm._

_Keep shining Michel._

_Yours,_

_Lorelai x_

Michel had been so busy trying to avoid all human contact he hadn't realised any of this.

He would hate to admit it but he really did love Lorelai

How would he go to work everyday knowing that Lorelai was gone?

That place would fall into the ground without Lorelai, and he knew it.

What can he do that would help fix this?


	7. Dear Chris,

**Im just gonna jump straight into Christophers letter because I cannot come up with anything before he reads it.**

...

_Chris,_

_There's so much I want to say, but I think I told you a lot of it the other day after we split. _

_I do love you Chris, I do, but we both know it wouldn't work. Like I said the other night, 'You are the man I want to want' it's just so hard after everything. I am glad that we were able to find a way out and still be friends. _

_You have done so well proving yourself about becoming a dad, I am sorry about giving you a hard time when Rory was growing up. I understand were your priorities were and I understand were you were coming from completely. _

_Please do not blame yourself for anything, I told the others the same. This is all my fault and I have found a way to fix it by leaving. It breaks my heart that I had to hurt you._

_Look after GiGi please. She is a good kid too._

_Love always,_

_Lorelai x_

Chris was confused. Of course he recognised the handwriting, how could he not he loves this woman, He was confused because he never thought that Lorelai was like this, he always knew her as the one with the tough exterior to crack because she was so stubborn.

He felt so bad, he felt like he was to blame for all of this.

He shouldn't have pushed her into a relationship like that.

He felt so guilty.

All he could think about was Rory.


	8. Dear Luke,

He had just finished closing the Diner.

The mail had been waiting for him since he began working this morning. But as always he leaves it until he is finished. He was about to throw it all away, when he saw the letter with the all too familiar handwriting on it.

Upon opening the letter Luke knew he was about to regret everything.

_Luke,_

_Oh Luke I am so sorry. I was such a bad person to you. I took everything I had with you for granted, I am so sorry._

_I didn't mean to drop an ultimatum on you like that, nor did I mean to run off to Christopher, but lately all I seem to do is cause so much pain to the people around me. _

_I hurt you and nothing is going to ever change that. I should never have used April in our argument, she is only twelve none of this is her fault. It is all mine and I understand that now. You just wanted to get to know your daughter, I should've been supportive of that because I know you wanted kids.  
_

_I wanted to say thank you for everything you have ever done for me. You have been amazing with Rory and I will be eternally grateful for that. _

_You are the most amazing person ever Luke, you may not seem like it to most people but you really are a softy at heart. _

_I hate that things ended the way they did between us, I hope that one day you find someone special who treats you right and loves you eternally. I am sorry I couldn't be that person for you._

_You Luke Danes are a god sent to this town, you supply the best coffee and food around (but shh don't tell Sookie). _

_Look after yourself_

_Love you always_

_Lorelai x_

He had sobbed reading the letter.

She was gone.

She had left.

And now he felt empty.

Luke had no idea Lorelai was feeling this way, and he felt partly to blame.

What can he do to fix it?


	9. Dear Everyone in Stars Hollow

Taylor was about to finish the town meeting, before he was handed the letter by Miss Patty.

Not even thinking Taylor just opened the letter and began to read

_To Everyone in Stars Hollow,_

_I am so sorry for the backlash of everything I have done. _

_I have fucked everything up with everyone. I hate what an impact I have had on this town in recent months, so I have decided to leave. _

_Please don't think of this as your fault, because it is all mine. _

_I hate that I have caused division in this town after my split with Luke and then Christopher. I should've listened to you all when you said Luke and I weren't a good match in the first place. _

_I love this town, and everyone in it but please understand why I have had to leave. _

_There is so much I want to say to you all, but I have never been good with words. Please don't fall out over this, I would hate for that to happen._

_I will never forget any of you. _

_I love you all._

_Yours,_

_Lorelai x_

The town were shocked. They were usually a tight knit community, but they hadn't realised that the much loved resident had been feeling this way.

Taylor scanned the room and saw that Sookie, Jackson, Luke and Rory were not there. All 4 of them had been in their homes, sad and upset about recent events they didn't even think about the Town Meeting.

The residents had felt so guilty, not only did they not know Lorelai's feelings but they hadn't even noticed she was gone.

How had they failed at being so close with one another?

The town was slowly beginning to fall apart.


	10. 2 Weeks

2 weeks, it had been 2 weeks without Lorelai Victoria Gilmore in the small town of Stars Hollow.

The police had refused to do anything about the disappearance because Lorelai left on her own terms, they didn't acknowledge the letters because they didn't suggest she would harm herself.

The town had felt empty, nobody had attended the town meetings, Luke's was closed, The Inn was falling apart and most importantly Rory hadn't left the house.

...

At the Gilmore Residence Emily and Richard tried to figure out where their daughter would go this time. They both understood she would need time to cool off after everything that had happened in her life, however neither of the Gilmore's understood why she wouldn't talk to them about it because they had been getting on a little better after Richards heart attack.

...

Rory had found her self in her mothers room, holding onto the blanket tight, she pulled her phone out to leave the millionth voice mail message to her mother. She clicked dial and just waited to hear the beep. She heard her mother's voice mail tone, that voice she had missed over the last 2 weeks.

_You've reached Lorelai Gilmore, please leave your name and number and I will try to get back to you. _

'Hey Mom it's me again. Please, please, please come back. I need you here, we can talk about everything that your feeling just please come back. This town needs you. I love you' And with that she cut the phone off and sunk further into the bed. She needed her mother.

...

Sookie had wanted her best friend to show up at the Inn, she needed to be there to comfort her, to help her through this emotional pain she was feeling. Sookie couldn't help but think she had let her best friend down. She just hoped that they found her and that Lorelai hadn't done anything stupid.

She had called her best friend 3 times a day over the last 2 weeks which always sounded like this

_You've reached Lorelai Gilmore, please leave your name and number and I will try to get back to you._

'Lorelai it's me Sookie again. Look hunny, please come home. Everybody misses you, Davey keeps asking for Auntie Lorelai. I need you hun, please. Please come home'

sometimes they would sound like this

'Lorelai. Where are you? I need you please. We can talk about everything like we always do. Please.'

...

Michel hadn't made one smart remark in 2 weeks, because he didn't have anyone to be smart back. He couldn't make smart remarks without Lorelai's witty and sarcastic presence when he did.

He hadn't even cracked a real or fake smile, his face remained blank.

Like there was a part of him missing.

...

Chris felt heavily guilty for everything. He had called Rory the day he got the letter to talk to her and told her everything he was feeling about this situation. Rory didn't blame anyone in this, except her mother's stubbornness.

Lorelai had become the type of person that would put others before herself. She had proved that many times in the past.

...

Luke hadn't felt the need to open the Diner in the last 2 weeks, because he couldn't think about her not coming in for her daily fix of coffee.

Luke was not one to think or worry, but Lorelai taking off like this worried him loads. If she had been feeling like this for a long time, then he should have been there for her. He should have been there to help her through this emotional pain.  
After calling Rory when he got his letter, Luke understood that she could've been feeling this way during the time she had fallen out with Rory. How could he not see this?

He had also been one of the ones calling Lorelai everyday

_You've reached Lorelai Gilmore, please leave your name and number and I will try to get back to you._

'Lorelai it's Luke. Everyone is going out of their minds here. Please come home let everyone help you. Rory is a wreck please'

...

Lorelai had somehow managed to find herself driving to different places that reminded her of the happy times.

She had spend the last 2 days in Martha's Vineyard trying to figure out what she was going to do next.

She had switched her phone off to avoid contact with anyone, because she knew they would drive her back.

Over the last 2 weeks Lorelai had it in her head that nobody needed her. Nobody needed her because nobody loved her.

Being reminded of the happy times she realised just how happy Stars Hollow would be without her.

Her thoughts had taken over her mind, she couldn't think straight any more.

The paranoia of hurting those around her all the time had taken over.

She was no longer the Lorelai she used to be.

Could anybody be able to save her?


	11. Search Parties

**Still 2 weeks after Lorelai left. This is going to be about looking for Lorelai and figuring out how to help her come through from this. Also we are going to pretend Sookie has a big car, because idk what care she has, so that this chapter can flow smoothly.**

...

The town had begun thinking of places they could possibly find Lorelai. Sookie had been in touch with Emily and Richard to find out any places they could think of and they agreed to come to the town meeting about it.

This town meeting was solely focussed on Lorelai (and was being held at 5am so the search could start that day), as the town needed to work together to find her since the police won't do anything.

'So town, we have the list of possible places. Now all we need to do is set up 6 different search parties to be able to cover all of the areas.' Taylor tells them

'Well, how many people would we have with how many areas?' Jackson questions.

'Well with their being 60 of us I thought 5-10 to a group, with 2 areas to cover each' Taylor adds 'So I have put together lists of groups and areas so if you could come and get a sheet before you leave.'

'But Taylor when does the search start?' Rory asks

'Today if we meet back here in an hour it will give everyone a chance to gather things they will need. As most of the areas are in the state of Connecticut it will be easier for groups 1-3 to carry light.' He says

...

**Luke's POV**

I'm in group 6, searching Martha's Vineyard. Group 6 is Rory, Emily, Richard, Sookie and myself. Taylor said we are the smallest group because we have the smallest area to cover. I never understood this man.

Once I have grabbed some of my things and packed them up I head back to the meeting, to get with my Group and we set off. Lucky for us the meeting was at 5am so we have all day to get there and begin searching.

'Who's car are we taking Grandpa?' Rory asks

'Well Sookie's car is bigger with 7 seats, that is if you don't mind Sookie?' Richard replies

'No, it's fine. We should leave now so we can get there and begin searching' Sookie says

The car ride to the docks for Martha's vineyard was quiet. Nobody wanted to talk about anything. Once we are off te ferry getting into Martha's Vineyard we begin to think of places we could search

'The only place I can think of is the Huntzeberger house we went to to for valentines last year. It's 2 hours out from here' Rory states. **(AN/ I have no idea how big the island of Martha's Vineyard actually is) **

...

**Lorelai's POV**

I find myself sitting on the rocks, looking above the ocean. It's a quiet place to gather my thoughts. I left home 2 weeks ago and I haven't found anywhere suitable to stay where I won't be found.  
...

I've been sitting here for more than 2 hours or so now, and I can see the house from Valentines day last year from this spot. All I can think of is the memories from there, the necklace Luke gave me. The one I am currently wearing, I hold it tight as I think about it.

_LORELAI: You know what a tennis bracelet is?_

_LUKE: Well, my sister makes jewellery, so I've picked up some terms._

_RORY: Wow, I love it. Happy Valentine's Day._

_LOGAN: Back at you, ace. _

_LUKE: Well, I guess it's my turn. Happy Valentine's Day._

_LORELAI: Really?_

_LUKE: Really._

_LORELAI: Oh, my god. Luke, it's beautiful._

_LUKE: Good, good. It's gonna to look great on you._

I loved that weekend, even though it started off badly it ended on a high note. It was the weekend we agreed that one day we would elope...

...

**Nobody's POV**

Group 6 had made it to the house, the whole way there they had been texting and calling the leaders of the other groups. They had since found out Lorelai had spent time at her late grandmother's property, Maine and various childhood day trip spots. As they pulled into the lot they found Lorelai's car parked in a space outside the house.

'She's here somewhere look.' Sookie pointed out

'Is that Lorelai's car?' Richard questioned

'Yeah Grandpa it's her number plate' Rory points out

'Right this is where we should split up, Sookie and Luke go and search around the back. Richard, Rory and I will check around the outside of the property' Emily announces

Sookie and Luke head towards the beach and the others go around the property.

**Luke's POV**

It's a relief that we have found Lorelai's Jeep, we are one step closer to finding her. As Sookie and I are walking along the beach finding a trace of Lorelai, I happen to look up and see a familiar figure sitting up on the rocks.

'Sookie look, up there.' I say pointing at the rocks

'Oh my God is that her?' She questions

'I don't know, lets just go up there quietly and see' I say

As we reach the rocks it we realise it is Lorelai, looking so broken and hurt. We are another step closer to bringing her home.


	12. Chats

Sookie and Luke gently walk up towards Lorelai, the pair sit down besides her and begin to speak

'Lorelai?' Sookie says gently

'You guys shouldn't be here, please just leave me alone' Lorelai says, in an almost whisper, crying.

'Everybody is worried about you' Luke tells her

'You don't need to be I am fine.' Lorelai tells them

'Lorelai hunny, you might not want to talk and we will respect that but you need to come home. Rory needs you, I need you.' Sookie says rubbing her best friends back. Luke steps away and makes a phone call

**Luke's POV**

I dial Rory's number and wait for her answer

'Hello?' Rory says

'Rory it's Luke. We've found her, up on the rocks at the top of the beach.' I inform her. The line goes silent and I can faintly hear Rory telling her grandparents.

'We are on our way' Rory says

I walk back over to Sookie and Lorelai taking a seat next to them.

'Lorelai, you have to know that you haven't done a thing that would hurt anyone. You have been an amazing role model to Rory, an amazing friend to every soul in town.' I tell her 'You have built your life and Rory's life up from nothing, and now you both have everything you have ever wanted. What's put all this into your head?' I ask her

'I did, I feel like I have disappointed everyone in town by breaking your heart and then Christophers. I never stopped to think how anything would affect Rory either, she was so happy when we were together and then I ruined it and again with Christopher and I ruined it again. I broke her heart too and I will never forgive myself for that.' Lorelai says, sobbing. None of us realise Emily, Richard and Rory had arrived behind us. All 3 look hurt to see Lorelai like this

**Richard's POV**

I walk up to my daughter and kneel down beside in front of her.

'Lorelai look at me for a second' I tell her, she gently lifts her face up. I take her hand and hold it

'You would never break Rory's heart, never. The both of you have an amazing relationship that could never be broken apart. You are an amazing mother Lorelai, never let anyone tell you otherwise. I want you to know I am proud of you. You have an amazing daughter, you have your own business, your own house and no matter what happens to you, you find a solution to fix it. You could never disappoint me Lorelai. Just you know that' I tell her, pulling her in for a hug. I let her stay like it, giving her some comfort.

**Nobody's POV**

'Mom, you have been amazing to me over the last 22 years. You have never put yourself first for anything, you always thought of me. Whenever we didn't have enough money for food for both of us, you always made sure I was fed. You have set so many amazing examples for me to follow and I am grateful for all of them.' Rory tells her.

'Lorelai, you could never disappoint a soul. You light up a room when you walk in, you are gentle kind and stubborn but that's what makes you, you. You do what you have to do to provide an amazing life for your daughter, and that takes a lot of strength. What you did when you took Rory, that wasn't selfish because you were looking out for Rory's future. Do you think that if you hadn't have taken Rory that she would have this amazing life now. Because I do not. You may feel like you have let everyone down, but you have not' Emily tells her, with a soft un-Emily like voice.

Lorelai looks up from the hug with her dad and looks at everyone.

'What did I do to deserve all of you? You have been amazing with everything.' Lorelai says, quietly again

'Now come on it's freezing lets get you somewhere warm' Richard says helping his daughter stand up

Lorelai allows him to grip her arm and walk with her to the car.

This was the first step towards working everything out

and everyone was grateful for it


	13. Home

**A/N I just read a review about nothing on Martha's Vineyard being 2 hours apart, I'm sorry I forgot its an island sorry again**

Luke insisted on driving home, so Richard could take care of Lorelai in the back as she hadn't let go of him since the hug. Sookie had decided to bring Lorelai's Jeep home.

When the got into the car and set off, Lorelai immediately fell asleep with her head resting on her fathers shoulder.

After a long journey home, Richard, Emily, Luke, Sookie and Rory were successful in bringing Lorelai home.

Once they reached Lorelai's home, Richard picked his daughter up and carried her inside not wanting to wake her. He hadn't picked Lorelai up like this since she was 4 years old.

'Coffee?' Sookie asks from the kitchen

'Yes please' Everyone shouts through

'I am going to make a couple more phone calls, let everyone know she is safe' Luke says stepping out the room.

Richard put Lorelai on the couch and allowed for her to rest against him as he sat beside her. It hurt him to see his daughter like this, but he now knew what he could do to help her.

Emily had insisted everyone who was on the search in the Vineyard stayed, so when Lorelai woke up she wouldn't get confused if someone had left.

After half an hour of small talk between everyone Lorelai had begun to stir, causing everyone to look at her.

'Lorelai?' Richard says gently,helping her sit up

'How did I get here?' She questions, confused

'We bought you home hunny' Sookie says softly

Lorelai looks down, embarrassed that her family and friends had seen her in such a state

'I'm sorry, I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I've been really stupid' Lorelai says, crying

'No Mom look, you don't have to apologise for anything. We are here to help you, help you get back to your old self. Rory says sitting next to her mother, embracing her into a hug

'Lorelai, one thing you are not is stupid. You are forever taking care of others, now it is our turn to take care of you.' Richard says to his daughter, rubbing her shoulder.

'I hurt everyone' Lorelai says, causing everyone to share worried glances.

'I, I hurt Luke and Christopher and that hurt Rory. I've upset Mom and Dad. I've upset everyone' she continues.

'Lorelai if you hurt everyone then the town wouldn't have gone looking for you. They all went out in groups looking for you. Everyone was worried about your safety, this town loves you Lorelai' Luke says

'Lorelai who's been telling you this stuff? Who put all of this in your head?' Emily asks, repeating what had been said in Martha's Vineyard.

'It's been replaying in my mind over and over. I've never been able to provide a stable relationship for Rory. I am a bad mother' Lorelai said. When Luke heard her say it, he remembered a time from the previous year when Lorelai had broke down when Paul Anka was sick. He walked over and knelt down in front of her

'Lorelai, do you remember that time last year when you got upset when Paul Anka was sick? You were talking about how you felt bad that you didn't take him to the vet, you told me you were a bad mother and I told you that you wasn't. Lorelai you are not a bad mother and that everything would be okay?' He says to her, causing her to look up

'Yes' Lorelai replies quietly

'Well believe me when I say that you are not a bad mother' Luke tells her

Lorelai remained silent, and began to drift off to sleep again. Richard gently lifted her head and rested it against the pillow on the Sofa. He signalled for everyone to go into the kitchen.

'We need to get her to see someone about all of this.' He tells them, looking in watching his daughter sleep 'and soon' He adds

**Short chapter but I am gonna try and do a long one where Lorelai goes to therapy to talk about all the stuff on her mind**

**Thanks for reading**


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